My husband was the first man in my life and we loved each other dearly even before we got married. I come from a fairly rich family, so my father could afford to send me to the United States of America for further learning after my first degree. My husband finished from the same university I attended a year before me, and he was about rounding off his national youth service when I was leaving for the US. It was a tough decision for me to take because I was not sure I would still have him when I returned to Nigeria.
I finally made up my mind to go, but not until my people had agreed to a wedding date. I was to come back after four months for the wedding. We agreed that my father would arrange my husband’s trip to the US too, so that we would not stay apart, and that he did in a record time.
The wedding was a big one. His people had nothing, so we had to shoulder the responsibility of making it successful. I was responsible for everything his nuclear family used on that day, and they were grateful. After the wedding, we travelled together to the U.S. I waited till I had finished my master’s programme before I got pregnant. All through that time, my husband remained the calm and loving guy I had met and married. Then suddenly, God answered our prayers and everything changed for better. My husband met some of his schoolmates in the U.S and before I knew it, money started rolling in from everywhere.
I was happy, that at last, he was going to bail out his entire family from poverty. I also felt happy that I was instrumental to his breakthrough. He took very good care of my baby and me and also went home regularly to see his people. His job would not allow for him to just sit back in the U.S. He travelled a lot to England and other countries. I had another child for him two years after the first one, and I did not suspect that he had changed from the man that I knew. Three years after his status changed, a friend of mine called me and said I must take the next flight to Nigeria to see what my husband was doing behind my back. I did not take her serious at first. But when she said she would pay my fare to Nigeria, I knew she meant business.
She told me to come on a particular day, and said I must not let my husband or even my people know that I had plans to come to Nigeria. I took my children to a friend’s place so that I would be able to go to Nigeria as advised by my friend. She was at the airport the day I arrived Nigeria to take me straight to our house in Lagos. I asked her what the matter was. She said she had thought she should not tell me what it was until we got there, but on a second thought, she felt that if she did not, I could faint by the time I saw what was happening. She told me that they were having a naming ceremony in our house in Lagos and that my mother-in-law sold Ankara to her friends and hired a band.
To say I was surprised would be an understatement. I was dumbfounded. However, I promised my friend that I would just walk in like a guest and leave them to their conscience. But when I got there, I could not. I went straight into our bedroom and found the mother of the baby there changing her clothes in the presence of some of her friends. My friend was following me to prevent me from doing anything rash, but she was not close enough. I grabbed the woman and dragged her out of the room, cursing on top of my voice as I did so.
My husband came and started begging. He prostrated and said I should not put him to shame, but I told him that the U.S police would soon come after him. I demanded that he sent the woman and her people out of the house immediately. When he was not doing so, I ran to the kitchen and took a knife. Immediately, he sent them and the baby out. When the fight was over, I sat down on the bed and cried. My friend could not leave me alone because she did not know what could happen next. It was very difficult for me to bear such, but my husband was so remorseful that I did not know what to do. I had thought it was the end of our relationship but he begged that he did not know what went over him.
I was to spend only one week in Nigeria, so two days after that incident, I went to my parents’ house to let them know I was around and to tell my mother what happened despite the fact that my husband begged me not to. I felt that if I did not tell her, I would be doing myself more harm. She screamed when I told her what happened and told me to tell my husband to see her. My husband respected my parents very much, so he went to see her immediately. I was there also. My mother talked to him like her son and he started crying. He said he did not really understand how all that happened and that it was as if he was under a spell.
On that note, we both left for the U.S. All attempts to see my mother-in-law proved abortive. My friend said it could be that she could not face me after all that happened that day. When we got back to the US, my husband kept to his promise to be a good husband. He refused to see the woman again and only sent money for the upkeep of her baby. But his mother was not happy. She called him one day and started saying all sorts of things on the phone. She did not know that I was the one that had picked the receiver, so she started saying that he was not meant for one woman only, that he was going to marry the woman that bore him a son whether he liked it or not. She said she knew that my parents and I had charmed him and that before long, he would see her handiwork. She said any mother that did not want her to reap the fruit of her labour in respect of her son would die untimely. She said she knew that my husband had made my mother his mother, and that she would make sure that she corrected that.
That day, I just dropped the phone without letting her know that she had been talking to the wrong person. I wondered how the woman could change so much overnight. The same woman that almost cursed herself as she prayed for me the day my father got my husband a visa. The woman who promised to fight tooth and nail to make sure I reaped the fruit of my labour. I was crying when my husband came in. He asked what happened and I told him. He said she was just being a woman and that I should not mind her. But deep down in me, I knew I was in for real trouble.
Two months after that, we heard the shocking news that my beloved mother had died.
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Often times I asked my husband, am I beautiful? And his automatic response is you’re the most beautiful woman in the whole world. And he will crown it by saying, more than so and so, i.e a movies star, a model or even a beauty queen. Alone, I usually consider his response and always thought he had actually told me what he felt I needed to hear, and I will say to myself, once I was beautiful now I am fat and ugly.
