What do I do?

I learnt a lesson over the weekend that I will never ever forget in a hurry. My husband and I are currently running a part time PG programme in civil engineering at one of the universities here. There have been series of issues with our course mates the one of which is the attitude of the non-working members of the class. The programme is supposed to run everyday in the evenings from 4-5pm. But because of laziness or I don’t know what to call on the part of some lecturers, they would insist we attend lectures with the regular students who has their classes in the mornings. Those of us living far off like a 6hours drive to and from the school always insist that nobody should, but the bad eggs that believed their lives depend on the completion of the programme will not listen to us.

Last week Friday, we got to school in the evening as usual to receive lectures only to find that a continuous assessment test had been fixed for that day even though we have a rep who was supposed to get us informed. We wrote the test without adequate preparation only to find out that an exam had been fixed that same day for the following Monday morning at 7am. First, even though we had agreed to attending lectures with the regular student, no one in their right senses and with good feeling towards others should have agreed to writing an exam for a part-time programme on a Monday morning when people are supposed to be at their various places of work. Secondly, no one fixes an exam within 72hours and thirdly, our program timetable came out and the same exam was fixed for a Saturday.

I really felt very bitter about this, because there was no way I could have gone for that exam without telling a serious lie “like I suddenly took ill over the weekend and could not make it to work that day” and same goes for my husband. We both had important things to do at our respective offices this morning. As I am writing, I believe the examination is going on and I really do need to take steps to ensure that the lecturer conduct our own exams later or the one they are writing now get cancelled so that we all can write it as at the date on our examination timetable.

Even though this situation could land us both an extra year if some serious steps are not taken, I have learned that with God at my side, I could attend alone against anyone or anything

Please advice what steps to take, to set this right and to avoid a repeat performance.

To stop the dream, I need closure.

At Xtmas, there was a lot of excitement in the air. Being excited comes naturally to everyone who started January and was about to witness the beginning of a new year 2009, I was excited too and I can feel same from every one I know, family members included. What I don’t understand was why people had to let the excitement get out of hand. It was quite confusing! Some cannot wait to welcome the New Year, in their excitement; they did things that put them at risk through which they could lose their lives and put everyone related to them in sorrow.

On a Saturday morning few days before Xtmas, I was on my way to Port Harcourt, shortly before Bomadi, I witnessed an accident that made me realise now more than ever that life is nothing, and a life without God is totally and absolutely useless. Some of the victims were travelling home for Xtmas; you can imagine the state their families were at Xtmas and New Year. I suspected it was a head on collision, nothing short of that could have resulted in that much fatality. Human parts were like pieces of rags on the road, their blood flowing everywhere with their properties strewn all over the road. It was a gruesome accident; I have never witnessed such before and never prayed to witness such ever again (Amen).

That incident has been on my mind all along and I realised the only way to get closure is writing about it, to send out a word of caution to everyone reading this post to be careful and not let the excitement of the season gets into their heads. Imagine travelling home for Xtmas to meet family member’s whom you have not seen for some time, you called ahead that you were coming, the expectation was high, the best thing would be for you to reunite in peace and joy, not maimed or worst for the corpse to be sent home to be buried.

Lets us be very careful. Life has no duplicate; it is better to be late than late. Anywhere you are going, caution is required when driving and if driven, please stay alert and keep track of the driver’s speed.

Divine Blessing.

Divine blessing is to invoke divine favour upon someone. It is only through God that one can get an abundance of blessings for which there can be no word to express enough gratitude. Men can bless us also but not the way God blesses. But whether divine blessings or human blessing, we need to adopt certain principles in order to unlock the windows of blessings.

First, there is need to be hardworking. Laziness cannot unlock the windows of divine or human blessings for anyone. Anyone who desire blessing must be ready to work hard to achieve it, not by breaking your backbones nor by burning yourself out or killing yourself in the name of hardwork, but by diligence and faithfulness to what you do. For example, I used to drive by a sport shop every morning on my way to work, one day I gave a friend a lift and as we passed by the shop, the man mentioned in passing that the owner of that sport shop has a commendable trait. He said he noticed that every morning he passed by, the man is already there setting out his wares, always at the same time. I have also noticed that and we both agreed that diligence and faithfulness to ones business or career is good and will eventually result in blessings from God and favour from people. If all you do with your life is laze around, day dreaming and hoping for the day some one will work up to you and say “ you just won a lottery” you might as well get ready for a life of poverty, failure and wretchedness.

Secondly, be grateful for all things, no matter how small or big. Imagine if you give your child a gift and he/she shows no gratitude or appreciation of what you gave, how do you feel? Of course, there are some people; no matter how hard you try you can never please them. They want you to sacrifice your life for them before they can tell you “ thank you” Ingratitude for the little favours we receive or for acts of kindness, mercy or help offered can and will surely emit a bad stench, which ultimately leads to disfavour. Please know it that disfavour closes the windows of blessings.

Thirdly, you must have a Vision: Proverbs 29:18 – where there is no vision, the people perish! Of course, having set goals help to make ones life a success and it also enable us to get positioned for blessings. Such goals should include “I want to be rich, I want have academic excellence, I want to be healthy, I want to have a happy home, a happy marriage, I want to raise Godly and responsible children, I want to live a fulfilled life. After listing all these goals, you really need to plan how you hope to make them a reality. Without vision, it is easy to perish.

Lastly, have a positive outlook on life. Don’t be negative, have a victorious attitude even when it seems as if you’re already defeated. See others in a positive light. Don’t be self centred, believing that it’s just you and you alone. Your needs don’t really have to be satisfied first, give others a chance while you wait patiently for your turn. Don’t put yourself down, declare positively; “I will make it”, “I will excel”, “It is well with me”, “I will not die but live”, ”I am beautiful”, “My children are wonderful” rather than “OH! What crazy children”.

For me, I want to be bless every second, minute, hour and everyday of my life. You should not be an exception. Desire the favour of God through divine blessings.

Shalom!

Tough times will go away.

If there has been a rain of hard times for you recently, it will interest you to know that the rain will stop, the gloom will disappear and there will be sunshine. If it has been bad news, one difficulty after another, failure, disappointment, depression, sickness, whatever, it is a time to have that season of your life.

Of course, To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven; A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace. Eccl 3:1-8.

He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end, Eccl 3:11. I know that, whatsoever God doeth, it shall be forever: nothing can be put to it, nor any thing taken from it: and God doeth it, that men should fear before him, Eccl 3:14.

We all take our turn facing those seasons when we keep waking up to another rainy day but be comforted because that raining season will soon be over in your life, your situation will change, your circumstances will be better, so you can say, no matter how many days it's been raining, "This is going to be good for us later on." God simply wouldn't let this happen if it wasn't going to be good for you later on.

And it may take a lot of rainy days for God to make you the man or woman He created you to be and redeemed you to be. He's toughening you, or maybe tenderizing you, purging you of old ways of doing things, squeezing you into new and better priorities, sensitizing you to people that maybe you've hurt or neglected, moving you to burn some old bridges or to treat some old wounds. What gets you through the rainy days is the calm as assurance that "God is working all this together for my good to make a better me."

Are you going to enjoy one rainy day after another? Not necessarily. But it sure helps to see them in the big picture perspective. God is using these days to prepare you for better day’s ahead. So, be strengthen and encourage yourself in faith, Remember, Tough times

don’t last but tough people do!

Mending a broken heart.

At one time or the other we must have had our hearts broken by the people we love and cherish, could be our children, spouses, parent, friends or brothers and sisters. But if you have not had your heart broken, then you are one of the few lucky ones. It hurts and badly too! You could imagine how you will feel to hear that your husband or wife has been seeing someone else. Your children could be engaging in activities that are contrary to your believe, for example a teenage girl getting pregnant out of wedlock of course, will surely break the heart of her parent who have plans for her future. Such hearts need to be mended and fast too, to avoid further damage to the mind and soul of such persons.

The big question is: how do we mend a broken heart?

A broken heart could be mended in the following ways;

1. Keep busy, occupy your spirit, soul and body. Don’t mop around thinking about what might have been. Idleness could make you do things that may result in more heartache, depression and frustration. Do something that take your mind off the problem or better still help someone to get through a difficulty. Just make sure you’re busy so you don’t have time to think about your own problems, with time you will forget.

2. Be good to others, do good. Don’t because someone hurt you repay other with evil, two wrongs don’t make it right. Wish the other person well so that you will not always carry the burden of bitterness around you. Don't wish something horrible would happen to him or her; rather hope for their good fortune and it just may release your blessings also. Sometimes some of these things happen to us for a purpose

3. Take time out to do those things you have always wanted to do but never have the time or the opportunity. Treat yourself to a nice surprise, make yourself happy, and put your life back on track.

4. Be thankful to be alive, the dead don’t feel pain, they know no hurt or anguish, praise God for making you one of the blessed people in the world because your life is not over, you can actually live without those who hurt you and even be happier without them around you.

You will overcome the hurt, rejection, pain, sorrow, bitterness and loneliness only if you tell the heartbreak to move over so you can continue with the rest of your life.

Did you say Mumps?

I woke up Tuesday morning to notice a swelling on my son’s face. My first thought was that he had hit his face against a wall in the night or had a fight at school and someone hit him in the process. All the same my first reaction was to take him to the hospital because I will not know how serious it is until I get him to the hospital. The doctor said Mumps is a viral infection spread by airborne droplets from the nose or throat, that the disease is most common in children after the age of two. He said it is good that I brought him as soon as I noticed it, that if not quickly attended to, it could cause the child severe pain, increase body temperature, cause fever, make him unable to eat or chew anything and if not properly treated can affect the scrotum.

On hearing this, I was so scared, anything to do with my child’s health is important. I had to do my own research to fully understand the infection better. I goggled mumps and came up with netdoctor, I was glad I did because after reading through the article I was relieved that it did not present any serious problem.

Well, thought I’d better get this out for people like me who had no previous experience of mumps, it could be unpleasant seeing your child’s ear sticking out with his face all swollen and disfigured. You could read further at Netdoctor.

I’m on my way back.

These days, I think I just found that I’m too lazy to blog. In between caring for my children, taking care of the home, going to work and running a post graduate programme, my hands are just too full to accommodate something else. I missed blogging, but I’m enough of a blogger to know that out of sight is out of mind. But thanks to the numerous friends who have been worried enough to ask why I have left things for so long. It was not actually for lack of things to write but for the lack of time to put pen to paper.

Because I am an advocate of good parenting and spending quality time with one’s children, I do not want to be found guilty of neglecting my children and my other responsibilities. Like an HSE quote says walk the talk.

Happy New Year to my numerous friends, wishing everyone a wonderful new year filled with good tidings. May all our dreams and aspirations come to fulfilment this year in Jesus name? (Amen!)